Welcome, devoted sub. Your Mistress deserves nothing less than mind-blowing pleasure, and you’re here to deliver it. This in-depth training guide will teach you how to use your mouth in total worship – backed by science and sprinkled with erotic Femdom flair. We’ll explore why facesitting (your Queen on her throne – your face) is the ultimate oral position, along with other positions like kneeling, side-lying, and prone. You’ll learn which tongue techniques, suction patterns, rhythms, pressure, and anatomical focus are most orgasmic for her, according to sex research and expert sexologists. We’ll also delve into the powerful psychology of dominance and submission that can turbocharge her arousal and climax.

Sound good, pet? Kneel, open wide, and let’s begin. By the end, you’ll be armed with knowledge and skills to make your Goddess come hard – and love your place beneath her.

The Science of Surrendered Pleasure

If you want to make her orgasm (and orgasm hard), the research is unequivocal: focus on the clitoris. Nearly 37% of women require clitoral stimulation to climax during intercourse, whereas only about 18% can orgasm from penetration alonepsypost.org. Even those who can come from vaginal penetration often say it’s much better with some clitoral attention – another ~36% say clit stimulation isn’t strictly necessary but intensifies their orgasmspsypost.org. In other words, penis-in-vagina alone is usually not the ticket to heaven for her. Oral sex, however, is often the golden key. Multiple studies confirm women are far more likely to orgasm from a tongue on their vulva than from intercoursevice.com. As famed sex therapist Ian Kerner put it, “Sex doesn’t make women come and oral sex does,” urging men to “put the tongue before the sword.”nymag.com In plain terms: if it isn’t about the clit, forget about itvice.com.

Why is cunnilingus such a game-changer? For one, it allows consistent, direct stimulation of her most sensitive organ. The clitoral glans packs 8,000 nerve endings (more than the penis) and is essentially the pleasure powerhouse. But it needs ample, gentle-yet-focused stimulation over time to trigger orgasm. The “time” part is crucial – the average woman often requires 15–18 minutes of continuous clitoral stimulation to reach her first climax, according to Kerner’s clinical experiencenymag.com. Compare that to the average man’s ~2 minutes of intercourse before ejaculationnymag.com, and you see why dedicating yourself to oral worship is so important. As a submissive lover, you have the perfect opportunity to slow down and savor her, giving her the sustained tongue-lashing her body craves.

Equally important is creating the right psychological environment for her orgasm. A large-scale survey of over a thousand women found that a majority cited “spending time to build up arousal,” a partner who knows what she likes, and emotional intimacy as key ingredients that enhance their orgasmsvice.com. Translation: Don’t rush this. Take your time warming her up – kiss her thighs, tease around her vulva, make her beg for your tongue. Let her anticipation build. Show her you’re attentive to her needs (more on communication later). And of course, make sure she feels comfortable and connected – trust is the bedrock of pleasure, especially in a D/s context. Sex therapists stress that being relaxed and not in a rush is key to orgasm: ensure she’s completely at ease before you even put your tongue on her clitvice.com. Remember, if she’s not comfortable, she won’t get offjhunewsletter.com. Your job as her sub is to create a safe, trusting space where she can let go and indulge in pleasure without anxiety.

Speaking of 

letting go: in BDSM research, partners often report that high trust levels allow the submissive to relax and surrender more deeply during playmed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca. That trust – knowing she’s in control and you’ll worship her exactly how she wants – frees her mind to focus purely on feeling. So, be reliable and obedient in your oral service; show her she can trust you to pleasure her correctly and respect her signals. The payoff will be huge: when a woman feels safe and adored, her arousal soars, and orgasms come much more readilyvice.com.

In summary, science and fetish wisdom agree: a tongue-devoted sub who focuses on her clit, takes his sweet time, and makes his Mistress feel secure and adored is a recipe for explosive orgasms. You’re literally closing the “orgasm gap” with your mouth – that notorious stat where only ~65% of heterosexual women usually climax vs 95% of menomgchronicles.medium.com. Under your eager tongue, your Mistress will always be in that 95%. Now, let’s get into the juicy details of how to lick, suck, and tease her to climax.

Techniques: Tongue Tricks and Oral Skills

Every Queen is unique in her preferences, so experiment to discover what makes your Mistress moan. That said, research reveals certain oral techniques are broadly popular – and some common mistakes to avoid. Below is your arsenal of cunnilingus techniques, with evidence-based tips to maximize her pleasure. Learn them, vary them, and most importantly, pay attention to her responses. When in doubt, communicate (ask for guidance or listen to her body language) – but we submissives often prefer to let our Mistresses simply grab our hair and use our face as they please. Either way, these techniques will ensure your tongue is up to the task:

• Start Soft – Tease Into Direct Clitoral Contact: The clitoral glans (the visible nub) is extremely sensitive. Dive in too hard or fast and you might overwhelm or even numb her. Many women prefer indirect stimulation at first – licking the clitoral hood or around the clit instead of directly on itjhunewsletter.com. Use the broad, flat part of your tongue to softly caress over the hood, or swirl around the clitoris in circles without flicking the tip directly. As she gets more aroused (you’ll hear it in her breathing and moans), the clit will swell and peek out. That’s your cue to gradually increase intensity. Most women do enjoy direct clitoral contact once they’re fully turned on – about two-thirds of women in one study said they like direct clit touchingpsypost.org – but even then, gentleness and lube (your saliva) are key. Keep your tongue wet and soft. If she’s one of the ~5% who find direct clit stimulation too intense altogetherpsypost.org, don’t worry – you can give her orgasms by focusing on the hood, inner labia, and surrounding areas. (Pro tip: many women actually orgasm most easily from stimulation just next to the clit or on the hood, rather than jackhammering the exposed glans.)
• Up-and-Down Licks – A Fan Favorite: When it comes to tongue motion, up-and-down is queen. In the largest scientific survey on women’s pleasure to date, 63.7% of women said they love an “up and down” movement on their vulvapsypost.org. In fact, 66.6% specifically cited “up-and-down with medium pressure” on the clit as their preferred touch stylevice.com. Why up-down? It may be because the clitoris has a shaft and internal bulbs extending vertically – stroking along that axis, from the hood downward, provides consistent friction. To do it: Point your tongue and glide it from just below her clit, upward over the clitoral head, and slightly onto the hood, then back down. Think of flicking the tip of your tongue upward, or alternatively, use a flatter tongue and “lap” up and down like you’re licking a delicious ice cream cone (she is far more delicious!). Keep the pressure medium – firm enough she really feels it, but not so hard that it’s abrasive. If she gasps “Don’t stop!” you’ve found the spot and motion – so maintain that up-and-down rhythm (more on consistency in a moment). Every so often, you can alternate short quick flicks with slower, longer licks to keep it interesting. Note: some women prefer side-to-side lapping (about 30% enjoy that) or circular motions (about 52%)psypost.org, so you can try those too. But up-and-down is generally the safest bet to start with. Pay attention to her reactions – if her hips start grinding against your face when you do a certain motion, focus there.
• Find Her Ideal Pressure: How hard should you lick? The study above suggests medium pressure is the sweet spot for mostvice.com. She likely wants to feel a definite, consistent touch on her clit, not a barely-there flutter. On the other hand, too much pressure (jabbing or pressing too hard) can be numbing or irritating. Start on the lighter side and let her body tell you if she needs more. A common mistake is being too delicate – timid little licks that might just tickle. If your Mistress starts grinding down seeking more contact, that’s a hint to press a bit firmer or use a broader tongue to increase surface area. Conversely, if she’s pulling away or the clit is escaping you (hiding under the hood) during stimulation, you might be too intense – back off a touch. When in doubt, medium steady pressure and rhythmical motion is your go-tovice.com. And remember: never bite the clit. (It should go without saying, but unless she explicitly orders a little nibbling, keep your teeth out of the equation except perhaps gently on her inner thighs.)
• Suck and Seal – The Suction Technique: Introducing your lips into the action can send her over the edge. Clit sucking, done right, creates a delicious vacuum sensation that many clitoris-owners adore. Gently suctioning the clit (or the whole clitoral area) boosts blood flow to the region, making it even more sensitive and engorgedvice.com. It’s the same principle high-end sex toys use with “air pulse” technology – but you’ve got a built-in toy: your mouth. To suck her clit like a pro, form an O-shape with your lips and encompass her clitoral area – this might mean taking the clit and some of the inner labia into your mouth. Create a gentle vacuum by sucking inward with your mouth. Do NOT go wild like you’re siphoning a thick milkshake; start with light, teasing suction. One expert advises, “Imagine you’re sucking on a straw and licking a lollipop at the same time.”vice.comIn practice, that means maintain that O-shaped seal and use your tongue while you suck – e.g. swirl your tongue around her clit or flick it as you gently suck in. You can try sucking one of her inner labia into your mouth, tickling it with your tongue, then releasing, then repeat on the other sidevice.com. This teasing of the labia can indirectly tug on the clit and feels amazing. Pro tip: As you suck, vary the intensity and angle. For instance, suck in, hold for a second (hear her moan as the blood rushes to her clit), then slowly release and immediately flick the clit tip with your tongue. Done rhythmically, suck-release-lick can drive her wild. Be creative: one trick is to flutter your tongue in a circle while maintaining suction, giving a 360° stimulation. Another is the classic “pop”: build suction, then release your mouth quickly so her clit feels a light tug/pop – many women find that jolt exciting. However, always gauge her reaction; some love suction, others prefer primarily licking. One study notes that fancy vibrators with suction are popular for a reason – it’s a unique sensation that oral can mimicvice.com. When she’s getting close, you might want to ease off big suction moves and switch back to consistent licking – or, if she loves the suck, latch on and don’t let go until she’s screaming. 😉
• Mix Up Motions… Until It’s Time Not To: Variety is the spice of sex, and indeed about 75% of women enjoy when you switch between different motions and intensities during oralpsypost.org. So explore with your tongue – flick, swirl, trace letters, alternate between broad licks and tiny rapid flickers. Use your whole mouth: maybe give her clit a few soft suckles, then french-kiss her vulva deeply, then return to targeted tongue strokes. Listen to her body – is she arching into you when you go faster? Moaning louder when you circle left versus right? You are gathering precious data. In the early and middle stages of arousal, feel free to experiment with patterns to find what really makes her toes curl. However, once you notice her nearing climax (her breathing quickens, thighs tensing, voice getting high-pitched or desperate), it’s crucial to stick to the winning combo. One sex therapist warns that “not many women can climax if the giver is constantly changing the rhythm or technique,” so when she’s on the brink, don’t you dare switch it up!vice.com If you’ve been doing fluttery side-to-side flicks on her clit and her legs start shaking, for heaven’s sake keep the same rhythm and pressure until she comes. Consistency at the finale is key – think of it like keeping a constant drumbeat as she races to orgasm. You can always get creative again for her next orgasm (oh yes, you’re going for multiple, aren’t you?). In sum: explore different motions and tongue tricks to learn her favorites, but when she gasps “Right there!” – stay right there and ride that rhythm through her climax.
• Don’t Neglect the Rest of the Vulva: While the clit is the star, stimulating the surrounding areas adds depth to her pleasure. Make use of your lips, chin, even your nose. For example, you can press your chin against her vaginal opening while your tongue works her clit – this gives a pleasant pressure and fullness. Or slide your tongue down to flutter at her vaginal entrance for a few seconds (the deep “come here” zone just inside can feel nice when licked, and you’ll get to enjoy more of her taste) before returning to the clit. Some subs even tongue-fuck their Mistress’s vagina as part of oral worship (essentially using your tongue like a small penis thrusting in and out) – it won’t make her orgasm on its own, but it can feel intimate and hot as a secondary stimulation. If she enjoys that filled sensation, you can do a few thrusts with your tongue, then immediately flick up to her clit – the contrast drives sensation home. Use your hands as well: you have two! You might slide a lubed finger between her outer labia to stroke the sides of her vulva, or gently pull the hood back to expose more clit when she’s ready. You can also caress her inner thighs, hips, or breasts simultaneously to amplify her arousal – many women love some nipple play during oral, so if she’s into that, pinch or rub her nipples in time with your licks. Just don’t get so distracted with fancy moves that you ignore her clit for too long; always return to the main event quickly. Think of these extra touches as embellishments to the central clitoral focus.
• Oral + Fingers = Blended Bliss: If you want to give your Domme the ultimate orgasmic experience, consider combining oral with a well-timed finger (or two) inside her vagina. Stimulating her G-spot (a couple of inches inside on the upper vaginal wall) while your tongue dances on her clit can create what’s known as a blended orgasm – orgasms from multiple zones at once – which many women report to be extra intense and satisfyingpoosh.com. How to do it: Once she’s very aroused and lubricated (either naturally or use some water-based lube on your fingers), slide one or two fingers inside her with your palm facing up. Curl your fingers in a “come here” motion to press against the rougher, ridged spot on her front vaginal wall – that’s the G-spot area. You’ll know you’re on it if she gives a positive reaction or you feel a spongy texture. Maintain a steady rubbing or pulsing on that spot. Meanwhile, your mouth stays on her clit – you might keep a gentle suction going on her clit or continue licking in whatever pattern she’s loving. The combo of inner pressure and external licking often makes women lose their minds (in the best way). As one sex columnist quipped, “A few fingers on the G-spot coupled with gentle clit teasing will send almost any woman into fits of pleasure.”jhunewsletter.com Many women can squirt or have very deep orgasms from this dual stimulation. Just be attuned to her cues – if she finds G-spot touch overwhelming or uncomfortable (not all vulva-havers enjoy it), she’ll let you know (sometimes it can make her feel like she needs to pee – communication is key here). But if she does enjoy it, prepare for an earth-shattering finish. Pro tip: Keep the rhythm consistent once she’s close, both internally and externally. It might take some coordination, but a devoted sub can handle it! The result, if done right, is a soul-rattling blended orgasm that feels “10 out of 10 or even 15 out of 10” in intensity compared to a single-source climaxwomenshealthmag.compoosh.com. Your Mistress will be seeing stars – and she’ll know her submissive has become an oral rockstar.

Now that you’ve got the techniques down, let’s talk about positions – because how you present yourself for oral servitude can amplify the pleasure and the power dynamic. Onward to positioning your eager mouth for maximum effect.

Dominant Positions: Her Throne and Beyond

Physical position during oral sex isn’t just about comfort (though that’s important too) – it also sets the tone of dominance and submission. As a submissive male, you want positions where she is unquestionably in charge, free to use you as her plaything. We’ll start with the ultimate Femdom oral pose – facesitting – and then explore others (kneeling, side-lying, prone) that deliver different flavors of fun. Importantly, certain positions can enhance her pleasure by giving better access to her hotspots or by leveraging gravity and angle. Research on coital positions shows that when a woman is on top, she orgasms more easily because she can control depth, pressure, and rhythmpmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov – and the same principle applies with oral. Any setup where she can grind on your face to her liking is going to be highly effective (not to mention insanely hot). Let’s dive in:

Facesitting: The Ultimate Throne

There is no image more emblematic of female dominance than a queen straddling her sub’s face – and it just so happens to be an orgasmic position for many women. Facesitting (aka “queening”) involves your Mistress planting herself on your face, usually while you lie flat on your back. She can face your head (classic facesit, looking down at you) or turn the other way (reverse facesit) depending on what she enjoys – facing forward lets her watch your eyes and expressions as you smother in her folds, while reverse gives her a view of your body and more direct access to grinding her clit on your tongue or nose. In either case, she is in complete control: she can pin your arms if desired, grab your hair to steer your mouth, and ride you as hard or soft as she wants. For the submissive (you), this position is the ultimate act of worship – you quite literally become her human throne.

From a pleasure standpoint, facesitting is fantastic for a few reasons. First, as mentioned, woman-on-top positions allow her to adjust everything to hit the right spotspmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov. If she wants more pressure on her clit, she can press down; if she wants faster friction, she can rock her hips at her own pace. Many women find that grinding their pelvis during oral – rather than lying passive – helps them climax faster, because they can maintain the exact pressure and angle that feels best. Facesitting encourages that kind of active participation. She can rub her clit on your tongue or even on your nose (pro tip: a well-placed nose can provide excellent pressure on the clit while your tongue penetrates her vaginal opening – truly being used as a sex toy!). Gravity is on her side too; as she pushes down, it’s easier for you to keep consistent contact on her hot spots.

Secondly, facesitting provides intense psychological arousal. Your Mistress is literally on top of the world (her world being your face). This feeling of power – seeing her sub’s face buried between her thighs, hearing your muffled groans as she takes her pleasure – can be a huge turn-on for a dominant woman. She might revel in a bit of consensual smothering, depriving you of breath for a few seconds as she orgasms (the thrill of which can even heighten her climax). Don’t be surprised if being in this position makes her extra wet and eager – dominance itself is a potent aphrodisiacmed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca. For you, the submissive, facesitting hits all the fetish buttons: bondage (you’re effectively pinned), humiliation (she’s using you like furniture or a toy), and the primal joy of being engulfed in her scent, heat, and taste. Your arousal will skyrocket, which only feeds hers more – a delicious feedback loop of lust.

Tips for facesitting: Make sure you have a comfortable setup. A pillow under your head can help elevate your face for a better angle (and protect the back of your head). Establish a hand tap or safe gesture in case you truly need air – a confident Mistress will usually hover just enough to let you catch a breath periodically, but safety first. Many dominants love to hover tantalizingly and make their sub beg for the privilege of contact (“Stick your tongue out and keep it out,” she might purr, then lower herself onto your open mouth). Follow orders! Keep your tongue extended and firm for her to grind on, or flick it as she dictates. Don’t be afraid to grab her ass or hips (if she permits) to pull her tighter against your mouth – most women love feeling your hungry grip guiding them deeper, as long as she is still the one in control of movement. Let her know (when you can speak) how much you love being smothered by her pussy – “Use me, Mistress, please, I’m yours to use.” The enthusiasm will boost her ego and arousal. If she wants a more relaxed facesitting, she might use a queening stool (a seat with a hole) to sit comfortably while you service her from below; but many prefer the full contact of your face against a mattress. Either way, facesitting is often the quickest path to an explosive orgasm for a dominant woman. She’s literally treating you like her pleasure tool, and the combination of physical and psychological stimulation is hard to beat. Don’t be surprised if she comes hard and perhaps multiple times while seated on her throne – after all, she’s in the driver’s seat of her orgasm here.

Kneeling Worship

The classic “kneel and serve” position is a staple of Femdom scenarios – and for good reason. In this position, your Mistress might be seated on the edge of a bed, on a sofa, or on a special chair (maybe her “throne”), and you are kneeling on the floor between her spread legs, face at her crotch. This is a wonderfully versatile setup. For her, it’s comfortable and controlling: she can sit back and relax like the queen she is, perhaps sipping wine or snapping commands, while you work diligently between her thighs. She can also scoot forward to grind against your mouth if she wants a more active role. For you, kneeling is appropriately submissive – you’re literally below her, on your knees, often with your hands obediently behind your back or resting on her thighs. It’s a pose of worship.

From a practical standpoint, many find this position allows great access and angle for oral. You can use your hands more freely if needed – for instance, one hand teasing her clit while you lick lower, or holding her lips open gently for better reach. In a recent guide for oral sex positions, one writer noted that “one person sitting on the edge of a bed or chair while the other kneels to give oral” is a personal favorite because “the receiver gets to just sit there and enjoy the service.”revolutiontherapyandyoga.com That’s exactly the vibe we want! Your Mistress can simply sit back and indulgein the sensation of your tongue, without any effort. Eye contact can be very intense in this pose – if she enjoys it, she might grab your hair and make you look up at her while your tongue is busy on her clit. The sight of her sub’s eyes looking up in supplication from between her legs can send a Dominant into overdrive. (Pro tip: If she says “eyes up,” do meet her gaze – it’s amazingly intimate and hot. If she prefers you keep your eyes down as a gesture of humility, do that – and focus on the feel and taste of her.)

Feel free to get creative while kneeling. You aren’t as squished as in facesitting, so you can use one hand to slide a finger inside her (for that G-spot combo) or stimulate her anally if she’s into it. You can also incorporate toys easily – perhaps holding a vibrator on her clit while you lick lower, if she enjoys very intense stimulation. Your other hand can be wrapping around her thigh or hip to leverage yourself or caress her body. Some submissive men also enjoy this position because they can grind their own erection into the bedding or even engage in a bit of self-denial (e.g., wearing a chastity cage or keeping their hands off themselves) while focusing 100% on her pleasure. She might even put her feet on your back like you’re her human footstool as you lick – oh, the imagery!

The dominance factor in kneeling oral is significant but perhaps a tad less in-your-face (literally) than facesitting. It’s a bit more traditional – she’s still clearly the one being served, but you’re not trapped under her. This can be great for longer sessions, as it’s less strain on both of you. She can stroke your hair affectionately as you lap at her (rewarding her pet for good behavior), or she can grab your ears and pull you in hard when she’s close to cumming. If she wants to exert more control, she can cross her legs behind your head, effectively locking you into your task. That little hint of “I’m not letting you go until I’m satisfied” is extremely erotic.

This position also allows for some verbal back-and-forth. She can easily speak to you: “Good boy, keep licking right there,” or “Tongue deeper, pet – yes, like that.” You, with mouth full, might manage some “Mmm” in response or simply obey diligently. If your Mistress enjoys giving instructions, kneeling oral is perfect for training you to do it exactly how she wants. In fact, many Femdom guides suggest this as the go-to training position for teaching a sub cunnilingus – the Domme can observe and correct technique as needed (perhaps using a crop lightly on your shoulder as encouragement!).

Overall, kneeling and giving oral reinforces the power exchange beautifully while providing her with intense pleasure. She’s likely to orgasm with a satisfied smile as you remain dutiful between her legs. And when she’s done, she can dismiss you to literally kiss her feet – you’ll be right there in position.

Side-Lying Service

This position is a bit more unorthodox, but very useful, especially for longer play sessions or for a different angle of attack. Here, your Mistress lies on her side, and you position yourself also on your side or at a slight angle to access her vulva. There are a couple ways to do this. One common variant: She lies on her side with her legs parted (maybe with a pillow between her knees), and you lie perpendicular to her (forming a T-shape), with your mouth at her groin. Another option is both lying on your sides, facing each other like spooning but at a 90° angle – your head between her thighs from the front. You may have to experiment to find a comfortable alignment where you can reach her clit easily without craning your neck too much.

Why side-lying? For one, it’s comfortable and intimate. She can relax completely on a bed, maybe propping her head up with one hand, while you nestle in to pleasure her. This can feel a bit more sensual and less “formal” D/s than kneeling or facesitting – it’s a great position if you two want a mix of dominance and cozy intimacy. She might drape a leg over your shoulder or have you hold one leg up slightly to give you room. The angle of your tongue will be slightly different, possibly hitting her clit from the side or at a diagonal, which for some women can be a novel and exciting sensation.

Side-lying also leaves your hands free in a convenient way. One of your arms will likely be under or around her hips – you can use that hand to grip her ass or reach around and tease her buttocks (or even sneak a finger to her anus if she enjoys rimming or anal play). Your other hand is free to roam – maybe you’ll caress her breasts, tweak her nipples, or rub her lower belly just above the pubic bone (some women love pressure there during oral). You could also slide that hand down between her legs from the front to rub her clit while you kiss and lick around her vulva – essentially doubling up stimulation. In side position, it’s easy to insert a finger in her vagina too, since you’re already oriented from the front. So you can absolutely employ the earlier blended technique here: e.g., two fingers inside curling toward her G-spot while your lips wrap around her clit. She’s lying on her side so she can also use a hand on herself if she wants (some women know exactly how they like to rub their clit and might do it while you lick internally or kiss thighs, etc., but since this is a training guide for you, ideally you become the expert at giving her exactly what she likes).

Another scenario for side-lying oral is if your Mistress wants to be more in control of your access. For example, she could lie on her side and have you lie behind her, also on your side, face between her legs from behind. In this configuration, she could even close her thighs a bit, partially smothering your face between them while on her side – it can heighten her sense of control (“I can cut off your air by just pressing my thighs together, slave”) and also give a different pressure on your tongue. It’s a bit like a sideways facesit, but more relaxed. She might enjoy the feeling of your warm breath on the back of her thighs and your tongue sneaking in from behind. This angle is great if she likes you focusing on her labia and vaginal opening with your tongue, because you’ll be approaching from a rear angle. You can still reach the clit, just perhaps more indirectly (under the hood from below).

Side-lying oral can be a very sustainable position for longer sessions, since neither of you is holding up your full weight (unlike kneeling or full facesitting). If your Mistress wants to lie back and receive tongue for an extended period (after all, sometimes it takes a while – and she might like a slow build), this is a comfy way to do it. She could even be doing something else – sipping tea, scrolling her phone, or using a vibrator on her nipples – while you quietly lick away at her. The casual nature of that can feel quite degrading (in a hot way) to the sub, and empowering for her: you’re just there, between her legs, providing pleasure while she is otherwise unbothered. Talk about objectification!

Prone (Face-Down) Pleasure

In the prone position, your Mistress lies on her stomach (face-down) while you service her from behind. This one is a bit tricky but can be incredibly satisfying with the right adjustments. Typically, she’d lie flat on the bed with a pillow under her hips to raise her butt slightly and part her legs a bit. You then approach from behind: you can lie on your stomach too, face between her thighs, or be on your knees behind her and bend down to reach her vulva with your mouth. This position essentially presents her vulva and anus from the back – it’s a very vulnerable position for her (which some submissives enjoy for themselves, but in this case she is the one lying down – still the receiver, so power dynamic intact). However, she’s not the one restrained – you are in a way, because you have to reach up into her from behind.

So why do this? For one, the prone position mimics “doggy style” penetration in terms of angle – except you’re using your mouth and possibly fingers. If your Mistress enjoys vaginal penetration from behind, she may love feeling your tongue and fingers exploring her from that angle. You can do some delightful combos here: for instance, use your tongue to lap at her clit from below/behind (you’ll kind of be licking upward toward her pubic mound) while you slip a finger into her vagina from behind. This angle of finger insertion will naturally press toward the front wall (because your palm will be facing down relative to her body, which still ends up stimulating the G-spot area effectively). You can even use your thumb to rub her anus or gently penetrate it (with lube) if she enjoys anal play, while your other fingers are inside her vagina – a true all-holes extravaganza. Many submissive men love rimming their Mistress, and prone is a great position for it: her cheeks are spread slightly by the pillow, and you have easy access to lick around and directly on her anus. If she’s into rimming, go for it – alternate between tonguing her back door and sliding that tongue up into her vagina and over her clit. The contrast of sensations can blow her mind. (If anal isn’t on the menu, no worries – stick to the clit and vaginal focus.)

Prone position can create a very intense pressure on her clit if she grinds down into the pillow or bed while you stimulate her. Some women orgasm easily face-down because they can clench their thighs and push their pelvis into the mattress, essentially controlling pressure. Meanwhile, your tongue or fingers from behind add even more stimulation. It can lead to very strong orgasms, sometimes squirting, because the entire pelvic floor is engaged. Encourage her to move however she likes: she might start rocking her hips or clenching when she’s close – that’s good. Your job is to keep up with her movements, maintaining contact on her clit or sweet spots as best you can.

The power dynamic in prone oral is a bit different: she’s lying in a passive position, but don’t be fooled – she’s still the one calling the shots. She can easily lift or lower her hips to guide you, or even reach back and grab your hair to press your face deeper into her. From your perspective, it’s very submissive because you’re doing all the work and she’s almost ignoring you aside from the pleasure you’re giving. She could, for instance, be moaning into the pillow while you desperately lick from behind. You can’t even see her face – you’re just staring at her ass and pussy, dutifully servicing. Some Dommes enjoy the idea of not even acknowledging the sub – just using him as a human vibrator while lying in luxury. Don’t be surprised if she tosses some verbal degradation at you here: “Good tongue, keep licking… I might let you breathe soon.” You’re effectively in a humble, worshipful pose – perhaps on all fours behind her – licking away while she relaxes. It’s a beautiful reversal of the typical “man on top” scenario; here, she’s on her belly enjoying herself, and you’re essentially the one prone, figuratively bowing to her from behind.

One more benefit: prone can be less tiring for her if she’s had several orgasms and is feeling jelly-legged. She can just flop down and let you continue stimulating her to multiples. Often, after one orgasm, the clit might be super sensitive. In prone, you could switch to kissing and licking very softly around her vulva or rubbing her shoulders (mix some massage with aftercare, perhaps) – then, when she’s ready for more, dive back in. Many women find that after a short break, they can climax again even harder. Being face-down also compresses the pelvic region a bit, which for some can intensify the next orgasm (almost like how humping a pillow feels different – in a good way – compared to other stim).

Encourage your Mistress to communicate here, since you can’t see her face. Little taps or wiggles can signal “move up” or “focus there.” You might ask occasionally, “Does it please you, Mistress?” and listen for her muffled “Mmhmm” or “Yes…don’t stop.” If you do hear “Don’t stop,” you know the rule: maintain that technique relentlessly until she’s quivering.

Each of these positions – facesitting, kneeling, side-lying, and prone – offers a unique pathway to her orgasm. Feel free to try multiple in one play session if she’s game. For instance, you might start kneeling, then have her push you to the floor for a vigorous facesit finish. Or she orgasms once from facesitting, then rolls to her side and purrs, “Again,” and you gently lap her to a second climax side-lying. Variety keeps things exciting, but always prioritize her comfort and controlin any position.

The Psychology of Pleasure and Power

Oral sex in a Femdom context isn’t just a physical act – it’s a deeply psychological dance of power, trust, and arousal. As a submissive male, your mind is likely on fire at the prospect of being “used” for her pleasure. And for a Dominant woman, having a partner literally at her feet (or between her thighs) can be an incredible ego boost and source of erotic thrill. Let’s explore how these mental aspects can supercharge the experience for both of you – and how you can leverage psychology to give her even bigger orgasms.

A. It’s All About Her – and That’s Liberating: In everyday sex, women often feel pressure to “perform” or reciprocate pleasure. In a D/s scenario like this, that pressure is gone. Your Mistress can be totally selfish – and that is fantastically freeing for her. She doesn’t have to worry about you (you’re content licking and worshipping, by definition!), so she can focus 100% on chasing her own pleasure. Many women report that knowing their partner is genuinely dedicated to their orgasm, with no strings attached, helps them climax more easily. It aligns with research showing women orgasm more when they feel their partner truly cares about what feels good for themvice.com. As the sub, you reinforce this by encouraging her to use you: beg her to come on your face, tell her how beautiful her pussy is and how you crave her orgasm. Remove any sense of haste or obligation – this is her time. When a Dominant woman fully internalizes that her sub exists in that moment only to give, it often creates a surge of arousal and emotional safety that can lead to very strong orgasms. In essence, you’re offering a space where she can be selfish and indulgent – and ironically, that generosity on your part is incredibly seductive to the brain.

B. Trust and Surrender (for Her): While you are the one “surrendering” in a D/s dynamic, remember that she too must surrender in order to orgasm – surrender to sensation, let go of control in a bodily sense and allow the climax to wash over. This requires a deep level of trust. BDSM literature often emphasizes that “trust is the key to being able to let go during play.”med-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca The more she trusts you to respect her limits, listen to her body, and take care of her needs, the more she can mentally let herself fall into the pleasure you’re giving. So cultivate that trust. How? Communication and reliability. Before you even start, discuss any do’s and don’ts. During the act, be perceptive – if she winces or seems uncomfortable, adjust immediately. Show her that you can handle her body with reverence and skill. When trust is high, a submissive (receiver) is far less distracted by worries and can immerse in the momentmed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca. In practical terms: if she knows you’ll stop the instant she says stop (or uses the safeword), she’s free to explore even intense play (like slight choking with her thighs, or rough grinding) without anxiety. Knowing you’ve got her lets her “surrender” to orgasm – an interesting flip of the script where the Domme momentarily surrenders to the physical pleasure that you control with your tongue. It’s a symbiotic exchange of power in a way.

C. Devotion and Worship: Many Dominant women in the Femdom community talk about how orgasmic it is to feel utterly worshipped. When you’re giving oral in a fetish context, don’t shy away from a little theater. Make it clear through words and actions that you are in awe of her. Moan while you lick, like you can’t get enough. Whisper (when you come up for air) things like, “Goddess, your taste is perfection” or “I live to pleasure you.” Yes, it’s flowery – but if said with sincerity, it can send a Dominant over the edge. She is Queen; you are her devoted worshipper. This dynamic can be intensely arousing for her mind – she’s not just receiving oral sex, she’s being adored and exalted by a man at her feet. That level of psychological turn-on can amplify the physical sensations tenfold. Think of it as engaging the largest sex organ – the brain – while your mouth works below. The more you stoke her ego and sense of power, the more dopamine and adrenaline rush through her system, which can lead to stronger orgasms (there’s evidence that mental arousal and feelings of dominance can increase physiological arousal). Some Dominant women even report they orgasm from the mental aspect alone – the physical just tags along.

From your perspective, demonstrating devotion is probably second nature (you’re submissive, after all). But be mindful to do it in a way she enjoys. Some like sweet praise, others prefer you degrade yourself (“I’m your pathetic tongue-slave, please come in my mouth, Mistress”). Follow her lead on language. By fulfilling her particular fantasy – be it being worshipped as an almost deity or being a cruel queen using a human throne – you engage her psychological triggers. Roleplay elements can spice it up: maybe she’ll call you her “seat cushion” or you call her “Your Majesty.” It might feel silly to some, but trust me, if it turns her on, it’s worth it. Science tells us that sexual context and mental framing can change how stimuli are received – pain can even flip to pleasure if the context is right (BDSM researchers note that “pain can be experienced as rewarding within certain contexts”med-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca). Similarly, intense oral stimulation might normally be too much for some women, but when in the heat of a power-exchange scene, it becomes deliciously overwhelming instead of uncomfortable. It’s the mind that makes the difference.

D. The Submissive’s Arousal as Fuel: Here’s a fun secret: Many women get off on their partner’s arousal. In Femdom, the sight of a submissive man turned on out of his mind just from eating pussy can be a huge turn-on for the woman. She might notice how hard you are (if you’re allowed to be exposed) or hear your moans while you lick her – and that feedback loop can push her to orgasm. It’s a bit ironic: you’re focusing only on her pleasure, but that act makes you wildly excited, and seeing you in that state gives her a power rush and raw turn-on, which then increases her pleasure. Win-win! Don’t be afraid to let her see how much this is affecting you. If you’re humping the bed or your thighs are trembling, that’s okay. Some Dommes will explicitly incorporate this: “I know you’re aching, aren’t you? You want to touch yourself? Too bad, keep licking.” Such taunts emphasize her control and your desperation, which can make her feel even more powerful (and thus more aroused). If she allows, maybe she’ll have you stroke yourself while giving oral but forbid you from orgasming – that can heighten the tension for both of you. She might even time your release with hers (though don’t count on it; this is her orgasm we’re talking about!). The key point is, your arousal belongs to her in this dynamic and can be used to thrill her further.

On the flip side, your arousal must never distract from your service. Maintain discipline – your focus stays on her orgasm, not yours. The beautiful paradox is that when you do that, often both of you end up deeply satisfied (in your case, emotionally or spiritually satisfied if not physically, depending on whether she lets you finish). Embrace the mindset that her orgasm is your orgasm in a sense. Take pride and pleasure in it. This mental shift – deriving pleasure purely from giving – can put you in a kind of submissive bliss (“subspace”), which interestingly can make you an even better giver. You become laser-focused, almost meditative, on the act of licking and pleasing. She will feel that dedication.

E. Fetish Elements – Use Them Wisely: Femdom often comes with various fetishes that can be integrated into oral play: facesitting we covered (sometimes coupled with smothering/breath control fetish), perhaps foot worship before or after (e.g., she might have you kiss her feet and then lead you to her groin), maybe orgasm control/denial (for you), and even roleplay of forced oral (“lick me or else” – even though it’s consensual, playing with consensual non-consent can be edgy). If these are part of your dynamic, know that indulging them can amplify arousal – but always do so safely and consensually. For instance, if breath play is a turn-on, facesitting provides that naturally. Studies show a bit of pain or fear (in a consensual scenario) can spike adrenaline, which can then convert to heightened pleasure and a more intense climaxmedium.commedium.com. So if your Mistress enjoys smacking you or pulling your hair while you’re tongue-deep in her, that little stab of pain might actually make her orgasm feel sharper (our brains are weird and wonderful!). The power exchange itself, as noted earlier, is often more significant than any painmed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca. Knowing she could do anything she wants to you in that moment – that is the turn-on. She likely isn’t fantasizing about you in control (quite the opposite); she’s reveling in her sexual supremacy. So lean into whatever specific twist lights her fire. If it’s verbal humiliation (“Is that all you’ve got, slave? My grandmother could lick better!”), take it and improve your technique. If it’s physical roughness (grinding your face mercilessly, maybe slapping you after orgasm because you daredmake her come so hard – haha), accept it as your reward.

One psychological aspect to always keep in mind: aftercare. Intense scenes – even one that “only” involves oral sex – can be emotionally and physically draining (in a good way) for both. Once your Mistress has had her fill of orgasms and you’re both coming down, switch into a gentle mode. Ask if she’d like water or a towel. Massage her if she wants. Compliment how amazing she was. Some Dominants like to cuddle their sub after, others might prefer you quietly clean up. Either way, showing that you care for her comfort after reinforces the trust and intimacy you share. It’s all part of the experience.

Conclusion: Devotion Leads to Ecstasy

You’ve now learned how submission and science combine to create toe-curling, sheet-soaking orgasms for your Mistress. By focusing on her anatomical needs (that marvelous clitoris and its friends) and her psychological desires (to feel powerful, adored, and utterly satisfied), you hold the key to unlocking orgasms she’ll not soon forget. Remember, your role as a submissive oral servant is one of honor – you have the privilege of giving pleasure without expecting anything in return. Ironically, in doing so, you’ll likely find a pleasure of your own that far exceeds a mere physical release. There is deep joy in hearing her cry out in ecstasy, knowing you caused that by your devotion and skill.

As you practice these techniques, communicate openly, and attune yourself to her responses, you’ll become more than just a guy giving oral – you’ll become her trusted orgasm provider, her secret weapon for stress relief and naughty fun, her partner in power and pleasure. Few things solidify a Femdom relationship like the ritual of oral worship: it can be tender, filthy, affectionate, degrading, and euphoric all at once.

So go ahead – immerse yourself in the task. Slather her with your saliva, hum with delight against her vulva, and feel her thighs tremble around your ears. She is your Queen, and you are the tongue-bound knight sworn to serve her. In this loving act of submission, both of you are winners: her in receiving the pleasure she deserves, and you in reveling in her climax and the power of being the one who delivered it.

Now, quit reading and get to licking – Her Majesty awaits, and science says you’re ready to reignite her world with pleasure. Serve well, and enjoy the sweet taste of her satisfaction.

References:

• Herbenick et al., J. Sex & Marital Therapy (2017) – Large survey on women’s orgasm and touch preferencespsypost.orgpsypost.org.
• Vice.com – Oberhaus, D. (2017). The Science of Female Pleasure… (Orgasm study summary)vice.com.
• PsyPost.org – Dolan, E. (2017). Women are highly diverse… orgasm and touchpsypost.orgpsypost.org.
• Kerner, I. (2004). She Comes First – Cunnilingus techniques and statisticsnymag.comnymag.com.
• Gibson, S. – JHU News-Letter (2003). The G-Spot & female orgasm advicejhunewsletter.comjhunewsletter.com.
• Joshi, S. – Vice.com (2021). How to Not Suck at Clit Sucking (Expert tips on oral)vice.comvice.comvice.com.
• Dunkley et al. (2019). “Physical Pain as Pleasure: Theoretical Perspective” – BDSM research on trust, pain, powermed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.camed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.camed-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca.
• Revolution Therapy (2023). “Sit and Kneel” oral position recommendationrevolutiontherapyandyoga.com.
• Richmond, H. – Poosh.com (2022). Blended Orgasms Q&A (combined stimulation = intense orgasms)poosh.com.
• Medium.com (2025). Vicki Larson, Orgasm gap and BDSM pleasure principlesomgchronicles.medium.commedium.com.